being androgynous.

vivian:
at alice [p from high school]’s house. two days in a row she has been in my dream. weird. joleen is there too, not that i was even ever friends with her. i think it was joleen, anyway. we’re watching tv on a projector. a bunch of images go by, and there’s one of me with two other girls and i am in the middle of them and i am naked. but i have like, no boobs. i look like a boy physique-wise, but it’s me. it’s weird that it’s in there and i tell them to change the slide, but asides from that, i’m not too shocked or surprised or angry. i get up and go to the bathroom, and the bathroom is behind this little pull out wooden door type thing. i close the door behind me. the floor is like… covered with period blood. but it’s not like, just dripped blood, it’s like after someone on her period has taken a shower and the blood is mixed with water. that blood is everywhere. pretty sick. it’s alice’s. i’m grossed out a LITTLE and i wipe it off but still stand barefoot in the bloody floor (it’s not COVERED or anything, mind you, but it’s significant enough to be gross). i’m not as disgusted as i would be in real life.

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